as i sat at the back of the pick up
with the wind blowing in my face
i closed my eyes
listened to the song playing on my discman

"i miss you" was playing
as i listened to lyrics of the song
thoughts started to fill my head
thoughts of you and of my life

as i let my mind drift further
as i continued to listen to the song
i felt a drop of water rolling down my cheek

i know i shouldnt think so far
i know i shouldnt think too much
i felt guilt and pain sting my heart
i felt sadness and worry overcome me

i cringed as these thoughts begin to fill my mind
all i ever wanted was to be happy
all i ever needed was for them to be there
all i ever wish for was things to be different

i feel like i am wearing a mask everyday
i feel like i am fighting everyday
my life is not as simple as it may seem
i wish i didnt have to hide things

as i sat at the back of the pick up
with the wind ceasing to blow in my face
i opened my eyes
the song on my discman stops

i get off the car,
i smiled at them
pretended like the episode didnt happen
and i wish silently that things were different